My Child Hates Reading: What Can I Do?

“I hate reading”. They’re words no parent wants to hear.

It can stir up worry, confusion, and often frustration for both you and your kid. When your child declares that they “hate reading,” there is usually something hidden beneath the surface. Let’s have a look at some tactics to uncover the true meaning, as well as methods for overcoming this hurdle.

Uncover the Real Reason

Take a step back and ask yourself: Where is this coming from? Why is my child so adamant about not reading? What is the root of this? Uncover the reluctance before diving into solutions.

The first step should be having a conversation with their teacher or ongoing tutor. What is their opinion on this topic? Do they see any evidence of a potential learning need? Do they feel the books in school are too easy or too challenging for them? Does your child have a fixed mindset, and a fear of trying new things?

Next, have a chat with your child (which may or may not involve their teacher). Listen with empathy, and reply with love. Having an open and honest discussion may shed a tremendous amount of light on why they are feeling reluctant.

Melissa Taylor, author of Book Love: Help Your Child Grow from Reluctant to Enthusiastic Reader, says, “For some children, it’s because it’s really too hard for them. Some kids it’s just that they haven’t found the right book. Some kids are really just distracted by technology. Finding out the why behind it will help you figure out how to address the problem.”

How to Grow a Relationship with Reading

1. Create a Realistic Routine

If your child resists reading, it may be that they feel they have no say in the matter; it’s simply a chore that must be done. If this is the case, give them some agency with how they spend their time. You might ask, “How many pages can you read before you need a break?”, or “Do you want to do something fun before it’s time to read?”. If your child needs a break after every chapter or even every couple pages, give them a break! Creating a routine with built in breaks and playtime may make all the difference.

2. Read to your Child

Developing readers have a higher threshold for listening comprehension than reading comprehension. Try reading aloud to your child, and don’t shy away from challenging texts either. Hearing more complex stories may inspire your child’s interest in narratives, and is something they couldn’t have accessed themselves. And of course, try to select texts that they would be excited about - or better yet, give them a few options and have them choose!

3. Take a Trip to the Library (or eBook Store)

Let your child choose their own texts! When kids have a choice, they are more likely to engage in the content. Take a trip to the local library and let them roam the aisles, picking anything that interests them. They may only read one or two of the books, but it’s a start! If a local library is not accessible, let your child download free samples of eBooks instead.

4. Encourage a Growth Mindset

While it may be hard to hear that your child “hates reading,” do your best to listen to the subtext. Perhaps what they’re really saying is: I’m afraid I’m not good at reading. Dr. Carol Dweck, who coined the terms “growth” and “fixed mindset,” argues that kids may have a preconceived notion that they are or aren’t good at something (this is a fixed mindset). Try to cultivate their growth mindset instead. Remind your child how far they’ve come, and while it may feel challenging, that means the brain is learning something new!

5. Try Something Different

Try a different approach! Circle the items that resonate with you and then share them with your child. What would they like to try? Give one or two of them a shot and see what sticks!

●      Turn the subtitles on during their favorite shows. Reading along with a visual stimulus is a powerful learning tool.

●      Create a special space for reading, such as a favorite chair, a soft blanket on the floor, or even on a picnic blanket outside!

●      Role play. With younger children, reading characters in silly voices and with expression can spark joy and excitement in storytelling.

●      Follow along with audio books, or simply listen to audiobooks during downtime.

●      Join a book club. For kids that need a bit more structure, inquire as to if their school has a book club, or try starting one with your child’s friends and their parents. This can also be done virtually!

●      Try reading different genres, such as: graphic novels, comic strips, poetry, song lyrics, newspaper articles, blog posts, movie reviews, spoken word, and/or plays.

●      Use their interests to guide you.

●      Create a family reading routine and lead by example.

●      Watch a movie adaption first, and then read the book!

●      Celebrate successes, big or small. Reading can be challenging, so remember that no goal is too small to get excited about.

●      Get book recommendations from teachers, parents, and other kids. What is a great new read at the moment?

●      Encourage reading everything out loud, such as: menus, road signs, movie synopsis, and cook books.

Takeaway

For whatever the reason, some kids are reluctant to read. It’s essential to understand where these feelings stem from, and if something else is going on that needs additional attention - such as a learning need or fear of failure.

When you’re both on the same page about moving forward, try to create a routine, read out loud, let your child pick their own books, encourage a growth mindset, and/or try a different approach.

With any new skill, there is a learning curve. Focus on the journey rather than the outcome, because nobody becomes a star reader overnight!

Let’s take the “I hate reading” story and rewrite it.